but reality always drags me down and put me into more sorrow.
if time could stand still, i wish i could go back then and change my attitude.
i hate to not do everything to how i wish they turn out to be.
and when it happens, i can only tell myself to move on and that things will get better.
if only there is a starting point again.
i will definitely take the chance.
but the chance will never come.
and i have to bear this for the rest of my life.
the agony is starting to set in and it's drowning me.
when every single day is turning a toll on me.
and when all tt is left is just an empty shell.
i tried and i have to keep trying.
even if i wont reach the end in mind eventually, at least i tried.
the dream is vanishing and what is left is the cold reality.
it is not like this in the past.
i feel that i lost a part of me.
and i can never get it back anymore.