simple

the final week of the month is finally here! and the horrendous april is waiting for me. i just cnt bear to think how my life will be then. i will just have to take things one at a time. hopefully everything will not be too overwhelming for me to handle.

i learnt a new word in school 2 weeks ago: jaded. and it suits me totally. plus what i have been feeling for the past few months. it had been just continuous studying non-stop for all of us. right from the start of the semester. because we have so many tests and midterms and everyone just want to do well and that make things even more stressful. i want to feel better and be happy about what i am doing. i just want a weekend whereby i dont have to think about sch work and tests and really let my hair down.

i felt that i have never truly stopped and paused down once to look at all the things i have been missing so far in my life. it could have been a much simpler and easier path. but i took this instead. and sometimes, especially in times like this, i really question myself why did i ever do that for. i guess i knew that answer all along, i just want to rant for that moment. what an irony right. complaining about things that i chose for myself.

no matter how much i rant. no matter how hard things are going to get. i just have to believe that i can go through them.

breather

i should be studying for next week's pharmaco and the many upcoming tests. but here i am blogging because i finally ended the dell's ppt today! although things didnt really go the way i wanted, i am happy it is over! all the late nights has been making my brain worse- i realised i couldnt rmb stuff as well as last time. i need some gingko supplements to improve my memory! there is a pile of papers waiting for me to absorb them. if only i cn rmb all of them by mere touching that stack and all the info willl flow in. what naive thinking right.

and my gastric came to visit today after such a long time. had a really bad relapse today after the dell ppt. i think the h pylori in my stomach is multiplying and causing me all the upset. hopefully it will die down and not come back for a loong loong time.

need to go back to studying. the pile of papers is really stacking up and scary to see.

3/4 left.

the madness month is finally here. and 1 week had passed. it was not exactly pleasant but i am still glad that it is over. things will definitely turn worse and i am waiting for them to come. and i wonder, wat is behind all this hard work and effort. it kills to see things that dont reciprocate. it's like pouring water into a broken glass and not knowing why no matter how hard u try, u cnt seem to fill it up.


watching them definitely make me feel better. their passion saw them through the gruelling and depressing 24 months before their comeback. and so i cn still believe that as long as u truly put ur heart into it, u can achieve what u want eventually.