schizophrenia

i realised i had been pretty repetitive for tis few entries- repeatedly procrastinating.
and the truth is, i'm planning a mental escape route.
away of life. of sch. of pple. of perceptions. of expectations. of comparison.

being simple and average.
being myself.
i couldnt have asked for more.

i want to rip off this face of mine.

because i dont wan to live in agony under the scrutiny of others.

i'd fought. for too long in the past.

others said: u shldnt let all tt come to a waste. so hold on.

i noe i must.

i noe i had to.

i noe exactly wat i am supposed to do.

but i jus cnt bring myself to do them.

and it's killing me silently.
so save me.